{"id":5643,"date":"2019-06-01T00:00:28","date_gmt":"2019-06-01T07:00:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/todaysveterinarybusiness.com\/?p=5643"},"modified":"2022-03-08T20:49:32","modified_gmt":"2022-03-08T20:49:32","slug":"courage-the-strength-behind-it-all","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/navc.sitepreview.app\/todaysveterinarybusiness.com\/courage-the-strength-behind-it-all\/","title":{"rendered":"Courage: the strength behind it all"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>We\u2019ve been focusing lately on the first two components of emotional agility: compassion and curiosity. Now, we turn our attention to the final component, courage.<\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cCourage is the most important of all the virtues because without courage, you can\u2019t practice any other virtue consistently.\u201d<br \/>\n\u2014 Maya Angelou<\/em><\/p>\n<p>As Maya Angelou suggests, courage is an essential virtue because of its empowering effect on all other virtues. Courage is needed to step up to a challenge and stay the course when faltering would be easy. Courage is required to stand up to a bully. And as Professor Dumbledore observed, it takes courage to stand up to your friends. But when exercised, courage can be incredibly empowering and invigorating, propelling us in the direction of our dreams.<\/p>\n<h3>Courage in the Outer World<\/h3>\n<p>Each day produces regular examples of courage in action. To name just a few:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li><strong>Leaning in and moving on:<\/strong> When the going gets tough, the tough get going, as the saying goes. Sometimes this can look like the strength to not give up, not give in and to keep persisting even at the darkest hour. But courage is also necessary in order to recognize and accept that the time is right to move on from a situation, be it in your career or a relationship, when it is no longer serving you.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Speaking in public:<\/strong> Surveys consistently report that people rate public speaking as one of their greatest fears, so this one literally speaks for itself. Finding your voice and expressing knowledge, truth or wisdom in a public setting can be one of the greatest forms of empowered self-expression.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Having the difficult conversation:<\/strong> Perhaps one of the most fearful experiences for many of us is addressing something we find difficult to speak about. Life seems to provide an endless array of opportunities for difficult discussions, whether it is advocating for a raise you believe is deserved, addressing an issue of medical judgment with a colleague or finding a way to discuss the impact of a loved one\u2019s addiction issues in a truthful but constructive way. Only through courage do those conversations actually take place.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Challenging the status quo:<\/strong> To speak up about something you\u2019re genuinely passionate about, especially when you know you\u2019re in the minority, takes great courage. The film \u201cRBG\u201d explores this kind of courage as it chronicles the legal and judiciary career of Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Before joining the U.S. Supreme Court, this shy, diminutive woman was a tireless crusader for gender equality whose courage ultimately led her to successfully argue several high-profile gender-equality cases before an all-male High Court. She could have been another well-intentioned person who wanted to see the world change for the better. But because of her courage and perseverance, she was instrumental in creating that change.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><em>\u201cAbandon the idea of being fearless and instead walk directly into your fears, with your values as your guide, toward what matters to you. Courage is not an absence of fear; courage is fear walking.\u201d \u2014 Susan David, Ph.D.<\/em><\/p>\n<h3>Courage in Your Inner World<\/h3>\n<p><em>\u201cA man with outward courage dares to die; a man with inner courage dares to live.\u201d<br \/>\n\u2014 Lao Tzu, \u201cTao Te Ching\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Doug Silsbee\u2019s book \u201cPresence-Based Leadership\u201d offers an insightful analysis of how we are wired and why courage helps us grow:<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOur \u2018psychobiology\u2019 is the sum of what we\u2019ve learned throughout our life experiences that is deeply embedded (embodied) in our physiology. It is the physical corollary of our human identity. This psychobiology manifests in our habit nature.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOur identity is our self-image. When our identity is challenged, we are shaken. We act to protect our identity sometimes by hiding, lashing out or defending. Our psychobiology will do nearly anything to preserve the sense of self that we\u2019ve developed. We are quite capable in familiar situations. We are much less flexible and resourceful than we need to be in unfamiliar situations. Our well-established identities actively resist change.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cRecognizing our own habit nature and the limitations of our existing identity\/self-image is necessary if we want to grow and develop. The process involves putting our established identity on the line, potentially expanding it to include new elements that we never imagined possible or perhaps letting go of who we thought we were in order to become someone new.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>To experience personal growth, then, we must become vulnerable and present with our whole selves \u2014 the good, the bad and the ugly. This requires the courage to see our biases, projections, pain, resistance and other ego-driven perceptions. By gently being with these things and meeting whatever shows up within us with <a href=\"https:\/\/todaysveterinarybusiness.com\/help-is-on-the-way\/\">curiosity and compassion<\/a>, we begin the work of transformation and can get unstuck.<\/p>\n<p>To summarize, using Silsbee\u2019s words once again, having the courage to be more present with ourselves \u201cis a doorway into accelerated development and new ways of being. It\u2019s not always pleasant, but it\u2019s real, raw and new.\u201d<\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cIt takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.\u201d<br \/>\n\u2014 E.E. Cummings<\/em><\/p>\n<p>In \u201cDaring Greatly,\u201d Brene Brown captures the essence of this real and raw state that Silsbee describes:<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThe only thing I know for sure after all of this research is that if you\u2019re going to dare greatly, you\u2019re going to get your ass kicked at some point.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIf you choose courage, you will absolutely know failure, disappointment, setback, even heartbreak. That\u2019s why we call it courage. That\u2019s why it is so rare. Courage means <a href=\"https:\/\/todaysveterinarybusiness.com\/surrender-to-the-present\/\">being vulnerable<\/a>. It\u2019s about showing up when you can\u2019t predict or control the outcome. The real barrier to being courageous is our armor \u2014 the thoughts, emotions and behaviors that we use to protect ourselves when we aren\u2019t willing and able to rumble with our vulnerability. Instead of using armor for self-protection, we must make a commitment to lean into our vulnerability, to stay curious and generous, to stick with the messy middle part of challenging situations, to take a break and circle back when necessary, and to be fearless in owning our parts.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSelf-awareness and self-love matter. Practicing self-compassion and having patience with ourselves are essential.\u201d<\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cThe most fundamental aggression to ourselves, the most fundamental harm we can do to ourselves, is to remain ignorant by not having the courage and the respect to look at ourselves honestly and gently.\u201d<br \/>\n\u2014 Pema Ch\u00f6dr\u00f6n, \u201cWhen Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<h3>New Frontiers<\/h3>\n<p>So, the challenge and the opportunity for all of us is to access the compassion, curiosity and courage available within us to explore our own internal new frontiers. Invariably, those explorations lead us to an assessment of ourselves in the context of our values and our purpose, as Susan David, Ph.D., described in a recent blog post:<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSelf-doubt is never an isolated emotion. It is connected to what we value: If we doubt our ability to give an important presentation, it could be because we value being a skilled employee and want to do high-quality work. Take the time to clarify the value you\u2019re concerned about living up to.\u00a0Our uncomfortable feelings are signposts, leading us in the direction of our values.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIf dealt with compassionately and with curiosity, self-doubt can guide you toward a greater clarity of purpose and help you make decisions that fulfill that purpose. No one feels confident and courageous all the time. But once you notice your feelings and let them lead you to your values, you\u2019ll find it within yourself to be brave. Don\u2019t let your doubt paralyze you.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cRemember, courage is not the absence of all fear. \u2026 Courage is taking actions based on your values, even when you\u2019re afraid. With practice and reflection, our self-compassion can be an antidote to self-doubt. It\u2019s a journey, though. Sometimes it\u2019s hard work to be kind, especially to ourselves.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>When exercised together, compassion, <a href=\"https:\/\/todaysveterinarypractice.com\/mindfulness\/\">curiosity<\/a> and courage are a potent antidote to the common fears that can paralyze us as human beings. Things like our fear of failure or the fear that arises when someone or something threatens our self-image.<\/p>\n<p>As we become more adept at acknowledging and accepting any inner resistance or fear that arises in the form of doubt, worry, anxiety or panic, we open ourselves to personal growth and fulfillment. We become more and more able to tap into our own inner strength and wisdom and to live authentically and courageously.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>We\u2019ve been focusing lately on the first two components of emotional agility: compassion and curiosity.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":28,"featured_media":5644,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"iawp_total_views":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[335],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5643","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-june-july-2019","column-go-with-the-flow","clinical_topics-personal-professional-development"],"acf":{"hide_sidebar":false,"hide_sidebar_ad":false,"hide_all_ads":false},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.7 (Yoast SEO v27.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ 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