Stacee Santi
DVM
Dr. Stacee Santi is a veterinarian, the founder of a client engagement tech company, the author of Stop Acting Like a Girl, and the host of the Everyday Wonder Women podcast.
Read Articles Written by Stacee Santi
Veterinary medicine is nearly 80% female. But when you look at who’s running the show — owning the practices, sitting on boards, holding C-suite titles — the numbers start to shift. The pipeline is full of talented, driven women, yet somewhere along the way, leadership still skews male. If you’re a man in veterinary medicine, especially in a leadership role, you’re in a position of influence, whether you realize it or not. And with that influence comes the chance to help — not for show, but because it matters. The entire practice benefits when everyone on the team is seen, heard and supported.
Here are five moves every man can make to show up for the women on his team.
1. Introduce Her to Possibility
If a woman didn’t grow up with a mother in leadership, she might not have a clear picture of what’s personally possible. That matters. Emulating others is a big part of understanding “normal” and where you fit in the ecosystem. We don’t have to go far back to find women who didn’t have the same rights as men. For example, U.S. women weren’t allowed to have their credit cards in their name until 1974. And I find this one mind-blowing: Not until the Civil Rights Act of 1972 did many veterinary schools stop refusing to admit women on the grounds that they would leave the field to become mothers.
Do your part, men, by promoting examples of women as equals. Talk about women leading veterinary practices, running companies, building empires. Recommend a book. Share a podcast. Be intentional about what and who you highlight.
I recently interviewed author Heather Sharp for my podcast, Everyday Wonder Women [bit.ly/3RyHbnY]. She talked about career day in high school and having to pick from a drop-down menu. She chose “flight attendant” because that’s what her mom did. The teacher said, “Why don’t you circle ‘pilot’ instead?” She paused. It had never occurred to her. She just retired from a 30-year career as an airline and military pilot.
Try to be the one who helps expand what a woman sees as possible.
2. Help Her Stretch
You see the potential. She’s sharp, talented and capable, but she’s hesitant. Maybe she doesn’t feel ready for the leadership role, the big presentation or the next step.
Encourage her, not with a pat on the head, but with genuine belief in her abilities.
When my cousin Debra (the CFO of a major company) said she was driving a U-Haul solo from Texas to Arizona, some people in my family were appalled. A woman? Driving a moving truck? Alone? Others didn’t see the problem. It reflects the fact that everyday gender biases exist, and it’s pretty easy to underestimate what women can (and regularly do) handle. Debra didn’t flinch or let the naysayers get to her. She just threw it in drive and hit the road, like the boss she is.
Your team might have a technician who should be a veterinarian but needs that extra push. You might have a niece or the daughter of a friend who doesn’t yet see what she’s capable of doing. Maybe people see something as unconventional for a girl.
Here are three ways to encourage her:
- Call it out specifically. Instead of saying, “You’re great,” try, “You have a natural presence when you talk to clients. I think you’d be amazing leading a team.”
- Invite her to stretch her opportunities. Recommend her for a project, ask her to lead a case discussion or encourage her to apply for a new role.
- Back her up publicly. When she takes that step, speak up in meetings, give credit where it’s due and let others see your belief in her.
Be the one who helps her break those limits. Let her know you see her potential and help her build the confidence to go after it.
3. Make Space for the Quiet Ones
Not every woman wants to command the room. One of the most grounded, thoughtful team members I’ve worked with was also the quietest. She never interrupted and never talked over others. To some, it read as disinterest or meekness. A few assumed she wasn’t that sharp. The truth was she was more brilliant than the rest of us.
At first, I tried to make space for her in meetings by saying things like, “I’d love to hear what Sarah thinks.” But what I didn’t realize was that being called out in a room full of people pushed her to the edge of a panic attack.
Where did I discover her best insights? At the coffee machine. At her desk when I popped by to chat. I also discovered she opened up in emails and texts. And I quickly learned that she said things only once, so I’d better pay attention. She wasn’t an overdoer.
Over time, I helped her find her voice in group settings and made a point to recognize her publicly. Slowly, others started to see what I’d always seen.
Quiet doesn’t mean weak. It doesn’t mean disinterested. And it doesn’t mean less capable. Make the extra effort. Seek her out. Ask with intention. Then listen.
Authentic leadership knows that brilliance doesn’t always shout.
4. Understand That You Have No Idea What It’s Like
As a man, you don’t know what it’s like to be a woman in the workplace. You’ve never had your career questioned because of pregnancy. You aren’t expected to raise the kids, work full time and still keep up appearances. You haven’t had your ambition labeled as “aggressive” or been the only woman in the room with no one to model after.
You haven’t had to manage hormone shifts, fertility pressure or been part of a generation where women couldn’t get a credit card without a husband.
You also haven’t had a client ask if you’re the receptionist when you’re the doctor. You haven’t walked into a room full of male executives and realized they expect you to take notes, not lead. You haven’t had a male coworker repeat your idea two minutes later — and suddenly, everyone’s applauding his innovation.
You don’t have to understand it fully, but you do need to recognize that these things shape her experience and reactions to situations.
5. Give Her Space (Literally)
Let’s talk about physical presence because, whether you realize it or not, it matters. The numbers vary depending on the source, but a conservative estimate is that 1 in 5 women versus 1 in 20 men have experienced sexual violence. Most men don’t think twice about where they park their car at night or how far their hotel room is from the elevator. Most women do.
Women carry pepper spray. They grip their keys like weapons. They avoid stairwells. They do the math, in real time, on whether you’re standing too close.
So yes, you might be one of the good guys, but that doesn’t mean she knows it. Or feels it.
Be aware of your size. Your posture. Your volume. Your tone. Don’t loom. Don’t block doorways. Give her space to breathe. Take a step back. A softer tone. A little space.
Small adjustments can make a big difference in how safe a woman feels around you, whether you’re her colleague, her boss or a stranger passing by in the hallway
Life Lesson
Even with all five moves in your toolkit, sometimes the real learning happens in the everyday moments. Like this one:
I once had a male veterinarian on my team whose decision unintentionally overrode our female head technician. He owed her an apology and knew it. After chatting with them separately and encouraging them to work things out, I followed up a few days later.
“Did you get things smoothed over?” I asked him.
“Yep, all good! We worked it out,” he said, totally confident.
Later, in passing, I told the tech, “I’m glad you and Dr. X got things resolved.”
She looked at me, confused. “We didn’t.”
So I went back to him. “What exactly did you say when you apologized?”
He blinked and said, completely sincere, “Oh, I asked if she wanted to grab a beer sometime.”
Listen, I’ve since learned that is how some men make peace. But for most women? That’s not an apology. It’s an invitation to pretend something never happened.
I had to coach him on saying these words: “I’m sorry.”
Supporting women at work doesn’t require cupcakes, candles or awkward compliments. It just takes consistency, awareness and a willingness to lead with humility instead of a hero complex. You don’t need a cape. You just need to give a damn.
SIGNS OF PROGRESS
Women still face career barriers in the veterinary business — less representation in practice and company ownership, fewer leadership seats, and more challenges accessing capital than their male counterparts. But the tide is starting to turn.
In 2008, only 39% of veterinary practices were sold to women, according to a State of the Market report from Simmons & Associates. Fast-forward to today, and we’re seeing real momentum: From 2019 to 2023, women accounted for 54% of doctor-to-doctor practice purchases, according to Simmons VetStats.
We’re not where we need to be, but we’re moving in the right direction.
Ownership is no longer the exception for women in vet med. It’s becoming the expectation.
PAY DISPARITY
According to the American Veterinary Medical Association’s Economic State of the Veterinary Profession report, male associate veterinarians reported average annual compensation of $164,075 in 2023. Among female associates, the average was $129,760.
